Thursday, May 24, 2018

My Honors Journey - Student Words

Vol 2 No 28

Below is the transcript of the speech given by graduating Honors Studies Scholar Tyler Deskins, class of 2018.  A graduate of the Liberal Arts and Sciences Mathematics track, Tyler is heading on to SUNY Potsdam in the fall to study math with the hopes of getting into their BA/MA concurrent program in the spring.  We wish Tyler all the best as he moves on.  Also, student guest bloggers are  my favorite posts to make and I hope that you enjoy it as well...


My name is Tyler Deskins and I am a mathematics major here at FLCC. (I hope that doesn’t scare anyone away) Today I’ve been asked to reflect a little on what the honors program has meant to me in my journey at FLCC.  I honestly don’t think it’s an exaggeration to say that without my involvement in this honors program, I would not be the type of learner that I am today.  At the very least, I would not be striving for academics in the way I am right now, nor would I have that drive that keeps me going.  A great deal of my development as a learner has occurred in these honors classes.  I’ve experienced some of my greatest challenges in them, I’ve celebrated some of my greatest triumphs in them with my fellow students, and perhaps most importantly, my college career started in the honors program as well.
My first semester attending FLCC was in the spring of 2015.  I was 16 years old at the time and this was meant to be an introductory semester for me.  Since the fourth grade up until that point in my life, I was homeschooled, and I had been away from a classroom for such a long period that I was just trying to get myself acclimated to the academic environment again.  I started by taking two classes that semester.  Loving mathematics, it was natural for me to take an introductory statistics class.  Not so natural, however, was my decision to enroll in an honors English 101 course.  At the time (I apologize Dr. Merrill) I detested English. * Dr. Merrill interjects “We’ve been doing this back and forth forever.” *  In part because I didn’t really know what the subject was.  I thought that English was learning information just to regurgitate it back to the professors.  Merely paraphrasing information, not the critical thinking I now know it to be.  Additionally, at the time I was quite nervous about my competency.  Without a high school education, I believed I would not be able to excel at the English course.  However, despite my anxiety over the subject (and with a bit of prodding from my parents), I enrolled.
The peak of my anxiety in that class occurred during our third class meeting.  I don’t recall why the subject was introduced, but we were having a class discussion about what we’ve learned in high school about English.  Part way though, Professor Margaret Gillio began her side of the discussion by saying “So we all know these ‘rules of English’ that we learned in high school…” and she began listing things such as paragraph structure, how to format a sentence properly, etc.  My heart sank.  Never had I formally learnd those rules.  I could understand them – after all, I had passed the placement exam to get into English 101 – but I was terrified that I would now be failing this class because I did not have these rules memorized.  And then I heard her say (I’m paraphrasing a little, but not much) “Now you know that list of rules you learned in high school?  Take it, crumple it up, throw it out the window.  It does not belong in a collegiate level English classroom. Part of what you will be doing in this class, and what may be a great challenge for some of you, is unlearning these supposed ‘rules.’”  That little speech gave me a great deal of encouragement because, for what seemed like the first time, I realized I was ahead of the curb because I didn’t have a high school education; which was awesome!!  As a result, I attacked the rest of the work in that semester.  Instead of just trying to pass the class I actively engaged with the material and gave it thought.  It was still very challenging for me, but I enjoyed every minute of it.  It was such an amazing learning experience for me. 
            My next semester – again, I was attending part time so I only took two classes that semester as well – I didn’t enroll in any honors classes.  In part because I didn’t know what the difference between honors and non-honors classes were.  The two classes I took were Interpersonal Communications and another English class; Composition II.  Surprisingly, that Composition II class is probably one of my favorite classes I’ve ever taken, largely because the instructor ran it much like an honors class.  The Interpersonal Communications class felt very… different; and not in a good way.  I disliked the class’s lecture style as well as the expectation of just assimilating information – like what I thought English was the year before – just to regurgitate it on an exam or paper.  I didn’t at the time, but I now understand what sets the Honors Classes apart.  In an Honors Class, the goal is to foster and develop critical thought.  They use the course curriculum as an opportunity to practice critical thinking in a supportive environment.  In traditional classes, you get the most out of them if you have that ability to think critically but a lot can be missed without it.  In them, critical thought is a prerequisite for true understanding but not a learning outcome.
            The following semester I relapsed and found myself taking three honors classes; a Psychology class, an Introduction to Literature class, and a chemistry class (while not typically an Honors Class it was made one through an honors contract).  The first two subjects I never expected to engage in, much less enjoy.  But to my surprise I loved both of them and became really immersed in the material.  The chemistry class was much more challenging.  What an honors contract means is that I am essentially the only one in my class doing the critical thought that is the hallmark of an Honors Class.  It was very difficult without the community of Honors Students to help support my inquiry and development.  But I found this to be a very helpful learning experience as well.  This Semester I did an independent study– not an honors independent study but one in advanced mathematics – and the chemistry course from that semester helped prepare me for the inquiry that I would have to do on my own in order to understand the material.  This was my first step in doing such major inquiry on my own; something that I will certainly need to do again if I choose to pursue a graduate degree down the line.
            The following semester I took two of the hardest class I’ve ever taken; both Honors Classes.  One was Dr. Merrill’s perspectives on J. R. R. Tolkien – the author of the Lord of the Rings trilogy – and the other was a Philosophy of Ethics class by Dr. Worrell.  While I already enjoyed both subjects, these two classes forced me to engage with the material far deeper than I ever intended to.  To merely create work considered passable for both, I needed to sink a great deal of effort into each thought I put on paper.  They pushed the limits of my writing ability; they shattered the preconceived notion that I would never have to nor be able to write at such a level.  I struggled in each assignment but never gave up.  They make the education ahead of me look easy, and I am grateful for that.
            Unfortunately, that was my last semester taking an Honors Class.  For the past three semesters I’ve desperately tried to work some into my schedule but have had no success.  Regardless, I am thankful for just how well my Honors Classes have prepared me for traditional classes as I now have a firm grasp on the critical thought that is required to get the most I can out of them.  For instance, History was another subject I absolutely dreaded at the age of 16.  Similar to English, I thought it was simply repeating back to your professor the material that both you and they already knew.  I now know that assumption was completely false.  The two History classes I took at this college were amazing because I could look at them through a critical lens.  I could interact with the people in these classes who were also looking to critically engage with the material.  We tried to learn as much as we could about the causes and influences of major events and we didn’t just do that by passively listening to lectures.  We asked the professors, we challenged each other’s ideas, we found information on our own, and we had a blast doing it.
            Perhaps the most important thing my Honors Classes have taught me is to look at the interdisciplinary nature of subjects; that no subject exists in isolation.  This is especially true, believe it or not, for different topics in mathematics.  Mathematical topics are typically taught segregated.  Calculus I-III and Differential Equations are treated separate from Linear and Abstract Algebra, which in turn are treated separate from Geometry and Topology, etc.  If you’re just trying to take these classes and assimilate as much information as you can, you are certain to miss the big picture.  But when you start looking for and seeing all the connections between topics, in my opinion, that’s where the true beauty of mathematics can be found.  I mean, for goodness sake, I did a mathematics presentation this semester on forms of non-standard mathematical logic and their connections to Buddhist philosophy!  Treating the subjects as separate entities, such a natural connection may never have been made.  And this certainly isn’t a property exclusive to mathematics.
This constant curiosity is how I have developed myself as a learner and how I will continue to develop myself as a learner as I move on from FLCC.  Without this foundation that my Honors Classes have provided me with, I would not be the learner I am today.  Looking at my journey up ahead, it is very important to me that I have such a foundation.  For all the Honors instructors and students I’ve met in and out of Honors Classes –and for all people who have supported me throughout my journey as a student – I really want to thank you for creating such an amazing environment.  One where people who truly want to learn, to engage more with the material and dig deeper, can find this community and help each other grow in meaningful ways.  I hope that one day all of us accepting our honors diplomas will make you proud to have been the people who helped make us who we are.  Thank you.


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